Lately, I’m going through this stupid battle between myself and the raging inexplicable emotions inside it. For some strange reason, I always feel so down and upset towards everything. I have no idea if it’s only me or the things around me are truly frustrating. I’ve been going on this cycle for quite some time and I still didn’t find the key to end all of this. I always feel that I am not good enough and all of my efforts to be in the place I really want to be in aren’t enough to take me there. And I cannot understand this. Honestly, I feel so lost. I really don’t know what to do in my life. Is the early stage of adulthood supposed to be this way? I don’t have any idea if this is the right path or what. I still feel that nothing is really happening in my life. They say this stage is supposed to be filled with fun but how come that it isn’t the case for me? I wish that there’s a manual teaching and giving tips on how to really deal with this. This is a crazy stage and it keeps on getting crazier with each passing day. Great.
I really missed talking to you where our stories to share stumbled upon one another. I really missed those days when we used to sleep at midnight just to simply converse about random things about our childhood, perspectives and beliefs and lives. The conversations we made still taunt me. I know those days were already over but there really comes a point in my life, when silence swallows me and all of the sudden, the thought of you would make me crazy and would bring a sudden thump in my chest. Honestly, I still want to talk with you. I missed those days. I really do. But I am pretty sure that they won’t ever happen again. It’s sad but true. And what sucks more is the bitter truth that I won’t be able to meet someone like you out there since you’re one-of-a-kind and the whole idea of you is beautiful for me. You’re incomparable and unique in your brilliant way. You are really one of the fewest persons I can talk with anything under the universe